Divorced Playbook

DDP 26, Sex and Dating Part 2: "Fix my dick, it’s broken"

January 19, 2021 Divorced Dad Playbook Episode 26
Divorced Playbook
DDP 26, Sex and Dating Part 2: "Fix my dick, it’s broken"
Chapters
Divorced Playbook
DDP 26, Sex and Dating Part 2: "Fix my dick, it’s broken"
Jan 19, 2021 Episode 26
Divorced Dad Playbook

Nicole Ananda, from Ananda Integrative Healing Group is our guest on this two-part episode. Scott, Dan and Nicole? This gets fun.

In Part 2, we talk about Nicole's practice, and what they do to help those with sexual dysfunction. We also talk a lot about Jesus. And whether or not you should go into a date with a list of questions you want to know. 

Oh, and watch until the very end, when Dan nearly has a heart attack. 

On what Ananda Integrative Healing Group does:

"I do run a clinical practice for people with sexual dysfunctions and intimacy issues. I employ two sex therapists and clinical therapists on my team. And we do surrogate partner therapy, which is basically experiential sex therapy. 

"It’s helping people work through intimacy issues and relationship issues, which is really the heart of it. It’s not sex. Everyone comes to me and says, 'fix my dick, it’s broken,' and we fix all of the other things that are causing that problem, which are childhood traumas and negative life experiences and anxiety and all of that. We help them work through it in an experiential way in a safe container."


On personal trauma leading to dysfunction:

"There’s Big T Trauma, and little T trauma."

"Most people have grown up in some sort of traumatic situation where they weren’t able to be their fully-expressed authentic selves and be met with love an acceptance and encouragement and so they end up with all kinds of maladaptive behaviors and ways of seeing the world that they need to then work through as they get older."


On Jesus and spirituality:

"Jesus started showing up for me in my spiritual journey and I was like, ‘what the hell?’ And then I just realized how much I resonate with Jesus’ energy. Christ energy is amazing. If you look at the words of Jesus and what he taught people, it’s love everyone and we’re all one. Love the prostitutes and the lepers, and that’s not what Christians today are doing, not all of them."

"We help connect people with the deepest parts of themselves that no one else is really even addressing. I feel like that’s why our programs work well, and we don’t do it from any kind of religious perspective. It’s just more about really being in touch and connected with yourself and another human being. And once you do that you can translate that and generalize it outside the work that we do, and learn to do it anywhere, and with anyone."


Other quotes from this half of the episode, in chronological order:

"That interview process would be wonderful I would love for someone to actually ask me questions and want to know who I am and whether I’m a good match for them."  

"It’s not like I’m not looking to have fun and experiences too, but I have a lot going on. I’m running a business — two businesses. I’m a single mom, right? I don’t have time for just fucking around."  

"The whole dance of dating is about getting to know someone and figuring out whether or not you’re compatible."

"If there’s a weird thing out there that someone can do, there’s a whole group of people out there who want to do it. It’s amazing."

"There is such a thing as TMI."

Show Notes

Nicole Ananda, from Ananda Integrative Healing Group is our guest on this two-part episode. Scott, Dan and Nicole? This gets fun.

In Part 2, we talk about Nicole's practice, and what they do to help those with sexual dysfunction. We also talk a lot about Jesus. And whether or not you should go into a date with a list of questions you want to know. 

Oh, and watch until the very end, when Dan nearly has a heart attack. 

On what Ananda Integrative Healing Group does:

"I do run a clinical practice for people with sexual dysfunctions and intimacy issues. I employ two sex therapists and clinical therapists on my team. And we do surrogate partner therapy, which is basically experiential sex therapy. 

"It’s helping people work through intimacy issues and relationship issues, which is really the heart of it. It’s not sex. Everyone comes to me and says, 'fix my dick, it’s broken,' and we fix all of the other things that are causing that problem, which are childhood traumas and negative life experiences and anxiety and all of that. We help them work through it in an experiential way in a safe container."


On personal trauma leading to dysfunction:

"There’s Big T Trauma, and little T trauma."

"Most people have grown up in some sort of traumatic situation where they weren’t able to be their fully-expressed authentic selves and be met with love an acceptance and encouragement and so they end up with all kinds of maladaptive behaviors and ways of seeing the world that they need to then work through as they get older."


On Jesus and spirituality:

"Jesus started showing up for me in my spiritual journey and I was like, ‘what the hell?’ And then I just realized how much I resonate with Jesus’ energy. Christ energy is amazing. If you look at the words of Jesus and what he taught people, it’s love everyone and we’re all one. Love the prostitutes and the lepers, and that’s not what Christians today are doing, not all of them."

"We help connect people with the deepest parts of themselves that no one else is really even addressing. I feel like that’s why our programs work well, and we don’t do it from any kind of religious perspective. It’s just more about really being in touch and connected with yourself and another human being. And once you do that you can translate that and generalize it outside the work that we do, and learn to do it anywhere, and with anyone."


Other quotes from this half of the episode, in chronological order:

"That interview process would be wonderful I would love for someone to actually ask me questions and want to know who I am and whether I’m a good match for them."  

"It’s not like I’m not looking to have fun and experiences too, but I have a lot going on. I’m running a business — two businesses. I’m a single mom, right? I don’t have time for just fucking around."  

"The whole dance of dating is about getting to know someone and figuring out whether or not you’re compatible."

"If there’s a weird thing out there that someone can do, there’s a whole group of people out there who want to do it. It’s amazing."

"There is such a thing as TMI."